It was back in the 90’s when Fay V. was “commish,”
\nA clean game of baseball was his ultimate wish.
\nHe saw the potential for the game to go bad,
\nHe warned of expulsion for the drug-using lad.
\nA few years would pass and the long balls were flying,
\nAs the skeptics and purists were secretly crying.
\nSammy and Mark were among the league leaders,
\nSome like yours truly just surmised they were cheaters.
\nA guy nicknamed “Cammy” gave SI bad news,
\nHe claimed he took drugs that were stronger than booze.
\n“Steroids are rampant,” said Ken Caminiti,
\nHe later would die on the streets of the city.
\nAnd then there was Barry with his monstrous home runs,
\nHis head had grown bigger–as well as his “guns.”
\nIn 2001, Bonds re-wrote history,
\nHe didn’t hit 60–he hit SEVENTY-THREE!
\nHe’d pick a good pitch and proceed to uncoil,
\nHe denied steroid use–it was pure flaxseed oil!
\nHe’d pass Henry Aaron and his numbers turned heads,
\nHe became such a villain–did he lie to the “feds?”
\nHe may do hard time–yes, he’ll no longer play,
\nPerhaps Bonds will share a small cell with O.J.
\nA man named “The Rocket” got better with age,
\nHe was mean to Piazza–a sign of ‘roid rage!
\nIt was Roger and Brian and tons of denials,
\nNeedles, syringes, some gauze pads and vials.
\nMcNamee spoke–did he fear for his life?
\nHe said he “shot” Roger–as well as his wife!
\nAnd then there was Pettitte–said he used it just ONCE,
\nTruthfully, Andy, do you think I’m a dunce?
\nMcGwire and Sosa–yes, they went to D.C.,
\nThey came off as weasels–as clear as can be.
\nAnd Mr. Canseco–he was called “way off base,”
\nHe said steroid use was all over the place!
\nRidiculed, bad-mouthed, Jose took it all,
\nAs players got bigger and records would fall.
\nExcuses, excuses–and man, are they lame,
\nIn upstate New York should be a new Hall of Shame.
\nIt was A-ROD and Sheffield, Giambi and Pettitte,
\nThe Yankees were dirty–but some fans forget it.
\nAnd Torre knew nothing–put his head in the sand,
\nWhile guys did more drugs than an 80’s rock band.
\nAnd now we hear A-ROD was ingesting the “dope,”
\nThis stuff’s more bizarre than a CBS soap.
\nWhen A-ROD’s at-bat, we all should yell “Fraud!”
\nAnd then turn the channel–perhaps a rerun of “Maude.”
\n“Advanced training methods” was always their “shtick,”
\nSome should do time just like one Michael Vick.
\nThe owners are guilty–as is head honcho Bud,
\nFor knowing these players had “juice” in their blood.
\nThe fans are still watching–still applauding these bums,
\nWith me, I see homers–then reach for the Tums.
\nThe union’s pure evil and condones criminal acts,
\nTo them it’s ’bout MONEY–to hell with the facts.
\nDon’t worry, just cheat–that’s the message they send,
\nYou CAN break the rules–it’s a means to an end.
\nMr. Fehr, Mr. Orza–when you’re\u00c2\u00a0weren’t at a meeting,
\nDo you secretly scheme to find NEW ways of cheating?
\nIt’s ’bout gaining an edge–yes, regardless of rules,
\nIf there’s money to be made, the union just drools.
\nI’ll soon see these players as they walk to the plate,
\nAnd I’ll think about scandals like the famed ‘Watergate.’
\nThese guys have grown bigger–and sign contracts with glee,
\nIt reminds me of storylines from the WWE.
\nThey’re cheaters and liars–they ALL should be busted,
\nAnd meanwhile us ball fans become more disgusted.
\nThey’ll take HGH and then tell us they’re clean,
\nIt’s no longer “baseball”–do you know what I mean?
\nI’ll still recognize all those homers by Aaron,
\nAs these idiots keep cheating while truly not carin’.
\nI long for the old days when the players had GUTS,
\nThey didn’t take short cuts–or put needles in butts.
\nI’ll focus on great ones–yes, players like Mays,
\nWho didn’t shoot up but made excellent plays.
\nI know that us sports writers–we sometimes get wordy,
\nEven more so when talking ’bout men who are dirty.
\nAnd now as I close I will offer you this,
\nIt’s become such a “freak show”–it’s BASEBALL that I miss.<\/p>\n
It was back in the 90’s when Fay V. was “commish,” A clean game of baseball was his ultimate wish. He saw the potential for the game to go bad, He warned of expulsion for the drug-using lad. A few years would pass and the long balls were flying, As the skeptics and purists were […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":730,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[1915,3130,6659,6655,6652,6651,6665,6653,6657,617,6654,6662,6664,6661,6667,6658,6660,6656,6666,6663],"class_list":["post-4630","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","tag-bums","tag-denials","tag-dunce","tag-excuses-excuses","tag-flaxseed-oil","tag-gauze-pads","tag-giambi","tag-hall-of-shame","tag-head-in-the-sand","tag-henry-aaron","tag-ken-caminiti","tag-league-leaders","tag-mcgwire","tag-mcnamee","tag-purists","tag-seventy-three","tag-steroid-use","tag-streets-of-the-city","tag-vials","tag-weasels"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4630","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/730"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4630"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4630\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4630"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4630"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/seamheads.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4630"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}